When we were discussing who needed to share thoughts about mother, Jan and Terry declined. I pointed out that the cold I was experiencing had left me no with no voice, to which they commented, “Shut up!” I think there was more behind that “Shut up!” than a desire that I regain my voice. So here is what I said - in a deep baritone voice:
Few relationships are sacred. When God created things, He made parenting sacred. (See #5 of the Ten Secrets of the Spiritual Universe usually referred to as the Ten Commandments) We, LaVerne’s children know things we hope everyone realizes about our mother. - We speak of the home she created – everywhere she went - Austin, McCamey, Midland - Waco all the same pattern. She did it even in temporary locales like Lake Buchanan, Wimberley, Lake Austin, Big Bend, WMU house parties, and her children’s homes. Her hospitality and cooking invited a person to relax and . . . well, feel at home.
Jan, Terry and I remember dozens of our friends and near relatives that were commonly found at our mother’s table whether her “real” children could get a chair or not! Many of you here today are among those we consider as our brothers and sisters, though we noticed that YOU never had to wash the dishes or mow the grass.
It was not uncommon for us to come home to find the likes of Trey, Jay, Brad, David and Keith, OR LeeAnn, Kerry, Laura, Michelle, Sandra and Marc telling mother everything they knew while snacking on a spare pork chop, some pot roast or some other tasty treat – none of our “secrets” were safe from her ears – EVER. She was sly - this woman.
Candi, Pat, Katrina, and Karen found it comfortable to chat with mother while Jan changed clothes - again or talked to some boy on the phone, because it was entertaining and fun chatting with LaVerne while waiting and waiting and waiting and waiting and waiting . . . on Jan.
Brother Alan made reservations, bought tickets, chauffeured, visited, and told everything he knew to this woman he called his second mother. Then he enlisted his wife Barbara and daughters Alissa and Ashley to help. None of them had any difficulty taking her side in discussions while critiquing her sons and daughter.
Debby, Greg & Karen, found the feeling and comfort of home in her kitchen. Hampton, and Jim knew her support and walked right on in as freely as we. Diann, Robby, Glen, Jon, Carol, Ronnie all sought her advice.
Her warm hospitality crossed generations with the friends of her grandchildren like Brad and Justin who did Hunter’s work outside while Hunter and Matt sat at Mother’s counter munching chocolate pie and fudge, waiting for the work to end. Brittainy’s friends Andrea, Angela, Scott, Angie, Austin and Blair were more loyal to Brittainy than Jan’s friends had been. They kept quiet about Brittainy’s escapades despite their frequent visits to Mother’s kitchen.
Rachel, Erin and Zac brought complete strangers through the door for visits and of course the free food. People like Blair, their girl friends passing through Waco, and a bunch of 2nd Lieutenants from the USAF.
I think Gram, as the grandkids called her, slacked off her work of intelligence gathering from the friends of the grandkids. At least she never passed the dirt along to the parents – Jan and I. You know how grandmothers spoil grandkids rotten.
Relatives thought of her as their counselor and confidant. Michelle, Chuck, Bill Joe, Kip, Kyle, Joe Bill, Louisa, Nancy, Laura, Sarah, Billie, Russell, Jane, Joye, Jean, and some preacher guy from Virginia named Garry felt her encouragement in large doses. (They also came to “borrow” some of those wonderful recipes.)
They came in droves and then came back - over and over. Jan, Terry and I humbly figure they came because they wanted to learn what she did right as a parent that made us turned out so well! [PAUSE FOR BRYAN'S AMEN!] (Was that funny?) We are CERTAIN that is why our spouses Trey, Melinda and Carol sought her out!
But we really know they were drawn to LaVerne because she was always genuinely thrilled to see them. She allowed free conversation in a safe environment of acceptance. She knew how to encourage them to great achievements, kindness and wise decisions. She looked forward to the next time they would return or she could watch them perform again.
She saw us all through eyes that were altered; altered by the power of God in her heart. She saw what we all could be with the Spirit’s guidance, so she pointed us ALL to Jesus. She encouraged all who knew her - including her children, grandchildren, great grandchildren, in-laws and friends. Not always overtly, but always purposefully. Recently she did it despite great pain and her own discouragement. She remained faithful; - scoring points for God in that great contest mentioned in Job and Ephesians 3, II Kings 6 and Hebrews12.
So in a way, today we are all orphans of a sort. No more kitchen side sessions. No more Snacks (that may not be a bad thing) [Turn sideways and pat belly.] No more phone calls driving home from work every day or after working a day and a half on-duty at the hospital.
But we all have reason to rejoice. For Wednesday in the predawn silence (that means before Brittainy’s kids got up), as I considered this state of being an orphan, God filled my head with an image not of my making. I saw my mother in a young healthy body clasping hands with the 2 loves of her life, my dad and Jesus. They were dancing wildly (yeah, see? my dad dancing - I told you not of MY making) and they had their heads thrown back as they spun in a circle. And they were laughing uproariously with joy.
You see, by faith in God’s promises, now and into eternity, we are never orphans.
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